Oh, The Things You Can Do...

So, lately I have been thinking of all the things I could accomplish if only I had a personal assistant/ stunt double. Here is what I am thinking:

1. She could take the chicken out of the freezer in the morning, so it can defrost. I can't remember to do that for the life of me.

2. ALSO, she can have dinner ready when I come home from work. Seeing as how I am no longer eating past 6 p.m. and I can never remember to defrost the chicken, I eat a lot of cereal and yogurt cups for dinner.

3. ALSO, she can tidy up my apartment while I am at work so that I have more time to play World of Warcraft when I get home....I mean....So that I have more time to go to the gym.

4. ALSO, she can go to the post office for me during the day. Now that Matt is deployed, I have taken up Care-Package-Mailing as my new side job. And since I have to be at work before the sun is up and before the post office is open, I have to go after work. And I would rather walk on hot coals than go to the post office after 4 p.m.

5. ALSO, she can pretend to be Ms. Harkins, the English teacher, between the hours of 1:30 and 3:30 p.m. so that I can either take a nap in the teacher's lounge or talk to my boyfriend on the phone.

6. ALSO, she can take care of that "laundry issue" I have, so that I don't have to waste my weekends doing chores.

That is all.